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Im somewhere lost in the murky waters between optimism and despair. The other night I got my first glance of Starlink edging across the night sky like a glow in the dark caterpillar and I began to realize the implication this will have on our environment as well. Not just the new night sky anomaly (which took me 1 hr of internetting to assure myself aliens weren't invading) but the satellite web of 5g waves that have begun to target us and everything else on this planet. Get ready for hi speed internet anywhere on earth.

Thoughts like this leave me tempted to break this radiation box Im typing on and walk off into the woods to stop my own selfish extraction of earths resources, hoping that I am not just spreading humanities curse of neglect and degradation to the innocent lives surviving in the wilds.

We are inevitably going to see things much worse before they get better, and we may not get to see that. The upside is that we will all die and relieve this planet of our own extractive gluttony. Feeling assured of this I must ask myself what can I do as an individual to assure that our children's children's children will begin to see things shift for the better? 7 generations from now will we exist and how much of this planet and its life will remain? I sometimes feel lost with this thought. However, despite my soundingly dark outlook, as I wade through murky waters I can see the sun setting and rising and know that life will persevere and know that we can rise from our filth laying down our old ways to see the sun rise again. It us up to each of us as "sovereign" human beings to take "responsibility" for ourselves to reduce our dependency on an unsustainable life. Its beyond time to look inside for our own light and follow that light through the darkness, not to become desperate but to remain inspired and hopeful.

Grow something. Be it a plant or a child or a tumor to lay you to rest. Grow something and embrace that life for what it is. Embrace the inevitable death not as a failure but as the pinnacle of existence. This is the point we are all moving towards, preparing for everyday.

How did you live today? Are you ready to die tomorrow? Be ready to die and be proud of the life you lived today. Inevitable death is my own inspiring outlook for my part in humanity. I don't mean to spread dark humor in saying this. It actually brightens my day to know this will all go away. I know that this planet will heal itself if given the chance. Our break from the world during this pandemic has given us a small view into how things can restore balance on their own.

First do no harm. The rest will follow.

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